Below
is a note written to a friend in response to a lovely and encouraging
note they wrote about Daniel and the impact his death had on their
family.
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Thanks for your
wonderfully sweet note. Judy and I were just
reflecting the other day how Daniel's death has been for us part of
what now
defines who we are. I think that for many folks who knew Daniel -
even
those who love us and who loved him, the three years that have passed
since his
death, to a large degree, have allowed the memories to fade. And that's
ok. It
would be surprising if it were otherwise. But for us, from whom
he drew
his life, it has been one of those experiences of such weight, that we
have
become deeply, and perhaps permanently changed by it. It is a
fact. I am
not intending to sound morose, because we are not sad and melancholy
people.
By God's grace we continue to live and embrace life, and to serve
Christ and
His body, and to find joy in Him and in many of His good and gracious
gifts. But we are not the same people we were 3 years ago.
We are
not stuck in the past, but we will never simply “move on.” And that too
is
ok. Even more than ok, I think this must also be as the Lord
intended. So as we live and work – as we laugh and think, and
sometimes
cry, we remember Daniel. A day does not pass that we don't miss
his
smile, his laugh, his stories, and his hugs. And so we look at
things,
and at each other, and at those around us . . . . differently. The Lord
is wise
and the Lord is good, so we trust Him absolutely, we worship Him, and
we love
Him. But still we miss Daniel, and I expect we will continue to do so
for a
long time yet – probably to the end of our days. So when we get a
note
like yours, it makes us glad, because we enjoy remembering him. And
when the
Lord allows us to catch small glimpses of His purposes, it encourages
our hearts,
because we are reminded that our Great God has wonderful and perfect
plans, for
us and for His kingdom. We needn’t fret nor fear as we are often
inclined to
do. And it also makes us glad to know that your family remembers the
young man
with whom our hearts were knit. May the Lord richly bless your
family and
continue to show you His grace.
MCR
May 14, 2008