I have A Death In The Family with me, and my little notepad and the same pack of cigarettes I've been working on since June. On a bench by the front of the dorm, in the warm afternoon light, watching the people come and go.

Not many bother to say 'hi' or even make eye contact. But this one, he approaches. I look up from my reading, and we chat for a few moments:

"What are you doing out here?"

I explain that I am enjoying the weather, and giving my roommate and her boyfriend a bit of space. He looks past me and sees the pack of cigarettes, and laughs, shaking his head. "Picking up lovely habits just like the rest of us."

I'm not a smoker though I do enjoy the occasional cigarette with friends. I insist this, but he doesn't seem to hear. Walking off, shaking his head. "Picking up lovely habits, just like the rest of us."

And, like the rest of us, he sees just what he wants. I suppose that's why no one here looks you in the eye. Walking along to class, people see you, but the look right through you. They make their snap judgement and continue along their way.

It's hard to get in, hard to find people that don't have those walls, or are at least willing to take them down. It's hard to find anyone honestly willing to see you.