I've got it figured: being alone forces you to be your own best friend. At first it's a rather difficult task. For the most part, I didn't like what I was left with when everyone went away.

But I have had to deal with myself. I was forced to, because all I had to rely on was me. No one else: everyone finds a way to die or to hate you or to just leave because they forget.

Being alone, you get to know yourself pretty well. A lot of times, what I knew I didn't like. In retrospect, I'm glad I dealt with that when I did. I got to see all of myself, see it pretty clearly, and in the harsh light of day. Digging around in the less-likeable sides of myself has made me a whole person and much more comfortable with my own darkness, with the non-kosher side that doesn't come out at the dinner table.